Confession time. K guys, I have a problem. The good news is a few years ago I finally understood I was not "lazy & no good", but I do go through some very real depression at times. Not as bad as some people suffer with. I still manage to function and few people could tell anything was going on. But I do have it. It is really nice that for me, at this stage of my life, it is the exception and not the rule.
This last couple weeks it hit me pretty hard. Harder than it has in many years. Feelings of complete uselessness. Sleeping very late. Unable to do really simple things. I always manage to get done what I have to get done, but nothing extra. And there is more than a small amount of self destruction going on. Again, I am very blessed. Mine consisted of eating poorly instead of what some have to deal with.
So the bottom line is last I weighed, it was 195. That was not today. I have turned a corner and managed to get up 2 days in a row before 8 am. So Sunday I start again! The cool thing is it is not at 250, 225, or even 200. Well at least I hope it is not 200.
My good husband has always been supportive. He has always been there no matter what. He was this time too. My kids have always been incredible. Can't have more blessings than tha! I do think I will set up a blog so this does not cram up facebook. Then anyone who cares can follow it.
I also plan on getting even more personal with my feelings, what I am doing, how hard it is or easy it is and so forth.
Thank you so much for all your support and caring. I think what that really says is even today, in this very complex world with some very horrible things happening, you know, the stuff all over any news channel. Even in this world, there are so many really good, caring and giving people. I just happen to have run into more than my share!
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