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Oh the joys of the yo yo. I would love to say that I did not deserve that number. ..... .....

Food: I snacked all day. No real meals. Nothing really bad... wait, like 3 P&J sandwiches. Plus lots of other stuff.

Exercise: Nothing great. Lots of moving furniture and running stuff up and down stairs. Enough to make you walk and move like a frail 80 yr old (as I know some 80 yr olds I could not keep up with).

Mood: Pretty good. Just tired. Appreciating a husband who not only tolerates but supports me. I am very lucky in that the depression is not the norm. Well it is. At least cycling through it is. But there is more time out of it than in it. It truly does make me appreciate the times it does not exist. And when it is there, it is miserable.

What is so ironic is that it is only recently that anyone knew I had this. And only because I have been more open about it. I found that is the case with many people who suffer from this. In fact, most people would tell you that I am "always in such a good mood!". Well, maybe not my husband and kids. I have also learned that is the case with a fairly large percentage of the "functioning depressed". They (I) am very good at keeping up an appearance even when things are very dark. People might not see someone depressed as much, they may stay to themselves more. But they (I) manage to appear quite happy. And not just "OK", but happy.

I smile as I read what I just wrote. It has not been all that long that I had a label for what has been going on most of my life. So I did not "know" I had depression either. People with depression often just feel "useless, lazy, tired, no good" and just about any other negative thing you can think of.

People who have never had it rarely understand. The most common thought is "just get going", "just get over it" and many other things along those lines. They just don't understand. And that makes it very difficult on everyone.

I someone you know can't seem to get motivated, can't seem to get started, they may be suffering from depression. There are tons of symptoms as it varies for individuals. Some commons ones are: weight gain or loss, lack of motivation, loss of interest in things they use to like, excessive sleeping, unable to sleep, absence from work or school, unable to focus. That is just the tip of the iceberg. Substance abuse can start to try to self medicate and it makes all the symptoms worse.

If you know someone who has some of these changes, you can talk to them. Sometimes just knowing that something is truly wrong and they are not worthless really helps.  More symptoms can be found on the internet. Also treatments. Medication can be and sometimes must be part of it. But there are other things to do. The main thing is to help. And your help may not be, likely will NOT be appreciated.

Oh, if someone seems way too happy out of character, that too can be a symptom, a way of trying to keep the secret.

See why this is so difficult? The good news is that it can change, usually will change with time and especially with help.